How to Manage a Difficult Employee

Perhaps they challenge every management decision. Maybe their attitude is affecting team morale. They might perform well technically but behave disruptively. Perhaps every management conversation results in another complaint, grievance, or lengthy confrontational email. Or maybe the working relationship has simply reached the point where you dread dealing with them.

Nectar HR helps employers untangle difficult employee situations and work out the safest and most practical way forward.

What is actually making the employee difficult to manage?

Start with facts rather than emotional labels. What are they actually doing on a day-to-day basis?

Common examples include:

• Refusing reasonable management instructions
• Speaking inappropriately to colleagues or clients
• Repeatedly challenging managers in front of the team
• Missing critical project deadlines
• Failing to meet required work standards
• Creating friction and interpersonal conflict within the team
• Sending excessive, passive-aggressive, or confrontational correspondence
• Ignoring established company procedures and workflows
• Being persistently late or having unexplained absences
• Making repeated informal or formal complaints
• Undermining management decisions and business direction

Once you identify the specific behaviour, you can determine whether you are dealing with performance (capability), conduct (disciplinary), attendance, a genuine workplace relationship breakdown, or something else entirely.

Separate personality from behaviour

You do not need to personally like every employee you manage. An employee being outspoken, direct, reserved, emotional, or challenging does not automatically mean they have committed workplace misconduct.

Focus instead on documented behaviour and its measurable impact.

Specific, evidenced behaviour can be addressed constructively. A "bad attitude" is almost impossible to manage fairly or defend before an Employment Tribunal.

Don't let problems drift

One of the most common mistakes UK employers make is avoiding the initial difficult conversation. Managers frequently tolerate disruptive behaviour for months because addressing it feels awkward or uncomfortable.

Eventually, something relatively minor happens and management wants to jump straight to termination. That creates a much harder, higher-risk HR problem.

“Address concerns promptly when they arise. A calm, structured management conversation today can prevent an acrimonious, costly disciplinary process three months later.”

Have a clear, structured conversation

When speaking with the employee informally, ensure you clearly explain:

1. What has happened, using specific date-stamped examples
2. Why it is a concern and how it impacts the business or team
3. What behaviour or standard you reasonably expect instead
4. What tangible changes need to occur immediately

Always give the employee a genuine opportunity to explain their perspective. There may be workplace factors you are unaware of, such as conflicting workload demands, personal difficulties, or lack of clarity. The conversation should be clear enough that the employee leaves understanding exactly what needs to change.

What if they complain every time I manage them?

This dynamic requires careful and tactical handling. An employee raising a complaint does not automatically mean legitimate management action must grind to a halt.

Equally, a formal grievance should never be summarily dismissed as a cynical attempt to derail performance or disciplinary procedures. You may need to assess whether the issues can run concurrently or whether the grievance needs to be addressed first. The right procedure depends on how closely the concerns overlap.

What if they raise a grievance against their manager?

Take it seriously and assess the substance of the allegations. A grievance does not automatically erase the original conduct or capability concerns.

However, if the grievance alleges that the immediate manager is bullying, discriminating against, or unfairly targeting the employee, you may need to reconsider who manages the ongoing procedure. Appointing an independent investigator or alternative decision-maker ensures procedural impartiality under the ACAS Code of Practice.

What if they suddenly go off sick?

This happens surprisingly often in contentious workplace situations. Do not panic, and do not assume that a sickness absence automatically halts every HR process.

Manage the absence compassionately and in line with your sickness policy, establishing the underlying health issue. Depending on the circumstances, obtaining medical reports or occupational health advice may be necessary, and reasonable procedural adjustments should be considered.

In many cases, HR processes can continue during sickness absence with appropriate adjustments; in others, pausing temporarily is legally advisable. Seek tailored HR counsel rather than applying an inflexible blanket rule.

Can I dismiss a difficult employee?

“Being difficult” is not a potentially fair reason for dismissal under the Employment Rights Act 1996. However, the documented behaviour behind that description may amount to misconduct, capability, or some other substantial reason (SOSR).

Dismissal must therefore be based on an evidenced, fair reason and a compliant procedure, not the fact that the employee is frustrating to manage. For detailed dismissal rules, read our dedicated guide on Can I Dismiss an Employee for Poor Performance? →

You don't have to manage the situation alone

Sometimes the greatest value of independent HR support is simply having an external specialist review everything that has occurred and say: “This is the actual issue. This is the legal risk. And this is the exact step-by-step procedure you should follow next.”

Nectar HR supports UK employers through complex employee relations situations, including capability, misconduct, grievances, sickness absence, workplace investigations, formal disciplinaries, and protected exit negotiations.